I knew the wise quote "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst". Then I came across another version which added this to the quote- "and unsurprised by anything in between." Boy, that is so true in an adoption scenario. Each adoption is different, but the common factors are the multiple hurdles along the way, most of which come out of nowhere and delay the process. So honestly, we were prepared to be "unsurprised"! Still, we had our moments of unexpected news that set us back quite a bit.
In April 2010, our home study was finally approved, our adoption course completed and our application was formally accepted by our out-of-state international adoption agency. We were told by our agency that the "time-to-referral" was about 18-24 months. So we gave ourselves 24 months to get a referral just so we could be prepared for the worst case scenario and be pleasantly surprised if we got the referral sooner. I of course prayed for a quick referral and paperwork processing.
Unfortunately 5 months later, in September 2010, we were informed by our agency that C*RA- the central adoption body in Ind*a, was revamping their guidelines and therefore the orphanages were not allowed to offer referral. I think the special needs referrals still continued. It was all up in the air though and there was no definite answer, process or plan in place by C*RA. We were told that Ind*a may reopen again in a few weeks, or months or years, and no one really knew. So our best bet was to start thinking of other countries that were still open unless we were willing to risk the uncertainty in Ind*a. We were reminded about Guatem*la adoption program that was put on hold for many years but for very different reasons.
Let me tell ya, that attitude of "hoping, preparing and being unsurprised", along with God's grace, is what kept me from falling apart so many times along the way.
* My one advise to those in the thick of their adoption journey is to guard your hearts. Trick your heart to plan for a longer time frame, but deep within, you know, you will hope and pray that your prayers are answered sooner.
In April 2010, our home study was finally approved, our adoption course completed and our application was formally accepted by our out-of-state international adoption agency. We were told by our agency that the "time-to-referral" was about 18-24 months. So we gave ourselves 24 months to get a referral just so we could be prepared for the worst case scenario and be pleasantly surprised if we got the referral sooner. I of course prayed for a quick referral and paperwork processing.
Unfortunately 5 months later, in September 2010, we were informed by our agency that C*RA- the central adoption body in Ind*a, was revamping their guidelines and therefore the orphanages were not allowed to offer referral. I think the special needs referrals still continued. It was all up in the air though and there was no definite answer, process or plan in place by C*RA. We were told that Ind*a may reopen again in a few weeks, or months or years, and no one really knew. So our best bet was to start thinking of other countries that were still open unless we were willing to risk the uncertainty in Ind*a. We were reminded about Guatem*la adoption program that was put on hold for many years but for very different reasons.
Let me tell ya, that attitude of "hoping, preparing and being unsurprised", along with God's grace, is what kept me from falling apart so many times along the way.
* My one advise to those in the thick of their adoption journey is to guard your hearts. Trick your heart to plan for a longer time frame, but deep within, you know, you will hope and pray that your prayers are answered sooner.
OH my yes....you definitely have to be prepared for the unexpected....lots of surprises. Sometimes I handle them better than others. :)
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